TiMe oF mY LiFe

Im whining

2010-03-06T23:34:00.000-08:00

Freaking tired this weekend,weekend suppose to be relaxing and happy. But its the total opposite with what I wanted. Report la, assignment la, discussion la, lab journal la....this la that la..DOn;t know when only can finish. How to pass this semester also have no idea. Really WTH...This is one part of life that I hate the most.

Gotta go, wish me all the best and my friends too.I hope they can tahan this stress till the end of this semester. Peace

Pray hard

2010-03-05T07:29:00.000-08:00

I seriously pray hard for it,for this time and for everything about this. Pray hard but will it be the result that I always want it to be? I know it will always not be the way that i want and i pray for. WHY? I don't even know,it just happen EVERYTIME. I guess this time it is real and it is really what i wanted for for so long.

Im really tired and exhausted after what I have been through with my ex,I think already spent too much of my time on him but things between us were just SUCKS!!! BIG TIME!!
I regret,regret that I know this person and have him as my boyfriend. Maybe y'all will say that im crazy and stupid that i never think before I couple up with him.But,ya,I never really think deeply and never take long time enough to get to know him. So,im regret. Let's not talk about that anymore,I don't give a damn shit bout him anymore.

I really pray hard....i pray and pray and pray...I really want this to happen.God,help me please. This is the only thing that i want it so badly now.PLEASE~~~~

STRESS

2010-03-03T07:09:00.001-08:00

Im really stress out this time...I have a lot of works to be done, assignment, lab report, homework etc. Mid term exam is around the corner but I haven't study anything,it really gets into me this time. I really don't know how. The amount of work that i need to do is way way way heavier and alot thqan the previous semesters. I just feel like give up and go back to Malaysia,but i know i can't. "sigh"

Alot of works,but don't know where to start. Im tired and sleepy everyday,how am I suppose study? After finish all the works already late. I memang tak tau la...How to survive in ITB for 1 sem and 2 more years? "sigh"

Signing off. Good nite...

All about me

2010-02-26T03:59:00.000-08:00

Another 2 days then it will be March,time really pass by very fast without noticing. I haven't do any study except before quiz or discussion. Im not as smart as the others,and im lazy.This is me! XD Sometimes I wish that i can have a brain of smart people,i don't need to be very smart.Just enough to let me pass my exam without alots of study..Ya,i know.It won't happen.

I realised that there is this rude person around me,he/she can just scold to anyone without consider of their feelings. Its not a big issue,but he/she want to make it BIG!!! Swearing around,using the F word and the B word.Never respect his/her friends. What kind of person is this?I don't even want to have anything to do with this particular person.><

Anyway,life is too short to HATE somone. I won't let this kinda people or some small things to bring me down. I want to live my life to the fullest and be HAPPY everyday. I can tell to my parent that im really really happy recently. I don't need a reason to be happy,i just want to appreciate everything that i have and stop complaining about what I don't have. I guess that everyone must be a grown up in their own way.

Im still confuse, but i will just go with the flow.It will just be something different this time.^^

Peace~~

Dont wanna come back

2010-02-21T07:11:00.000-08:00

I seriously don't feel like coming back...'sigh'
I feel somehow miserable and moody,same old schedule,NO! is more hectic. Same daily routine,lab,report,exams....and the list goes on.

Time passed very fast,one week just finished in a blink of eye.I miss him when i was back in Malaysia,maybe I have met the right person at the right time but nationality is our biggest problem,not the right place.I don't want to give up as a Malaysian.

Got to know that I have tons of homework to do..Fiuh.>< All the best to me.All the best to my friends too.

~Signing off~

fine fine

2010-02-03T08:22:00.000-08:00

I thought I will be emo,sad or whatever SHIT when I saw those 'stuff'.But,i guess I was wrong then....Im totally FINE!! Im so glad that Im fine^^

人生因为改变而美丽

2010-02-02T05:28:00.000-08:00

我认为我已经知道我最大的缺点了,
就是想太多和太过于执著..

应该是很早就知道了吧!
喜欢往坏的方面去想, 想东想西.
执着一样明知道是没有结果的东西, 或是不可能发生的东西.

觉得应该改变一下, 不应该太多愁善感.

曾听过: 人生因为改变而美丽
很有意思….

SWEET

2010-01-30T09:19:00.000-08:00

Ya,I can say that it's been a very long time since I feel like this.
It is just different,really different from the previous time.

It was just SWEET!

Big a** prob

2010-01-14T04:46:00.000-08:00

Fiuh..this post is not meant to be an emo post.But just can't help myself.Haha...

I think alot when I come back,emo alot.Jeez,i don't know why.Maybe i got this gene from my mom that worried and think too much.LOL.
What should I do? I know,I know,not worth it...Blah blah blah...Sigh

Why it is so hard for me to don't think and to be not 执著？

Big major problem here...must get rid of it in no time!!

Feeling changed

2010-01-08T03:38:00.000-08:00

In less than 24 hours then I will be back to my lovey dovey home..Hehe
It is really time for me to get my Ass back home.

I still remember the last time I went back home,the feeling changed.Im excited but not over the same thing again.Time seriously heal,Im way better now. I left my feelings behind in 2009.

There is no more turning back. There is always first and second time,but disappointment and betrayal destroyed everything,Yeah,everything.

Signing off.Bye bye Bandung,at least for now^^

Summary

2010-01-07T10:24:00.000-08:00

It's been awhile since I log in my blog,

Busy?Yeap,as usual..Exams,outing,being lazy,and crappy stuff.
Duh,the worst part is my Baby Laptop spoilt.Damn! I can't do anything with it,I won't even dare to take it to local service center,and they don't even have an Asus service center here for crying out loud..><

Rainy season started around mid December,it rains non stop starts from afternoon till the night time.Freaking cold, I really have no idea how i gonna survive when I go back to Malaysia,as I heard,its 'summer' in Malaysia.Arhggg...I just hope that my body can resist the heat and don't spoils my holiday mood.

I went to Cinangneng at Bogor during the 10 days break,and it was really fun and i experienced Kampung life. Haha...Expecially the mandi kerbau part.Want to upload my trip photos up to Facebook but my Baby cant help me with that,guess just gonna wait.Damn it!

I was up until now using Vicky's laptop,sleepy but I don't care.One more day and i will be back.My mum will certainly nag me if I sleep after 12am.22 this year but for her Im still a 1 year old girl.LOL.

Finished my 3rd sem,hmmm...This sem ends in a blink of eyes,I have my ups and downs. But just feel thankful that Im still here now. Just gonna enjoy my holiday.

What meant to be happen will come to you...So this time I not gonna rush,just let it go with a flow.

Good nite.

Signing off...XD

Truth...crossroad

2009-12-23T10:55:00.000-08:00

It's kinda sad to know the truth huh?

But still don't know what is the truth..

Left or right? Up or down?

Forward or backward?

Continue or stop?

Let the time tells bah...

眼泪笑了

2009-12-20T09:26:00.000-08:00

我命令眼泪不许失控
回忆不跟你走都挤在我心中
我就有责任让它值得被珍重
谢谢你曾让我难过
谢谢我没有想太多
当爱情左盼右顾的时候
我眼泪都笑了谁还想哭呢
再勇敢的站着找回光和热
面对你的时候我不会舍不得
因为你已是过客因为路有些曲折
是美的
心碎成了沙漠就快开凿绿洲
我没有时间不知所措
你温柔的双手本就不属于我
又何必在乎它以后属于谁呢
谢谢你曾让我难过
谢谢我没有想太多
当爱情左盼右顾的时候
我眼泪都笑了谁还想哭呢
再勇敢的站着找回光和热
面对你的时候我不会舍不得
因为你已是过客因为路有些曲折
(是美的)
你眼泪都笑了谁还会哭呢
来不及完美的就唱首骊歌
想起你的时候我不是卑微的
反而我没有遗憾因为我已爱过你
深深的

I like this song..nice nice nice...but SAD :(

Duh...

2009-12-16T22:07:00.000-08:00

HOT~~~

SLEEPY~~

BORING~~

HOMESICK~~

I guess everything will be alright,

I think everything will be fine,

I think MAYBE this way is better^^

HOT~~

GOING TO BATH~~

WTF

2009-12-15T20:16:00.000-08:00

What the hell is gong on with me today?? I couldn't wake up early in the morning, i haven't started my revision for Microbiology and Organic lab test. Oh My God!!!! Today just not that into me,i guess. I totally screwed up my paper for Microbiology. WTF!!!!

Now im stuck in half way doing my Organic lab report...jeezzz...what a f-king day.Seriously,im not that OK today. Had a bad dream last night,grrrr...a**holes and jacka** appeared in my dream. HELL YEAH!! AGAIN!!At least give me some prediction on the questions that going to come out today.WTH!!

It started out kinda bad,i hope it will end it well tonight...>< Tomorrow exam again!!!!! I just want to get out of this,all this stuff that bother me!!

reali
*&%#%^*(%#@#^

与妈妈的对话

2009-12-13T09:34:00.000-08:00

原来妈妈什么都知道, 看来身为女儿的我, 要瞒着她也不是件很容易的事.

刚才妈妈打电话给我, 谈来谈去就说到了我的问题. 很奇怪她并没有骂我, 只是一直在跟我分析和安慰罢了. 突然感觉到妈妈已经不再当我是小孩子了, 不会再骂我了. 虽然我知道在这件事我的确是做了个错误的选择. 她说她当初要阻止我可是她又怕我怪她, 所以想说的话还是留在心里了. 我是明白她的苦心, 只是当初还是不听劝告.

后悔? 不后悔啦.. 是我的选择嘛…

她说: 感情事不可以拖泥带水, 要直接了当, 不可以见异思迁, 不可以捉摸不定. 有些人的背景, 我们完全不知道, 或许你是用最真诚的心对待他, 可是在这种复杂, 人心难测的社会里, 还是要真正的看清楚才做决定. 我觉得你那次做了个太快的决定, 你根本还看不清楚. 其实我的第六感告诉我已经有
我说: 其实你说的我都懂, 只是一时糊涂做了太快的决定. 要怪就怪我当初不听朋友的劝告. 不听你说. 很多东西发生了我没有告诉你和爸爸因为不要你们担心, 现在我好多了. 伤心归伤心可是生活还是要过, 还要读书, 还要考试啊. 所以你们就不要==太担心我了啦…我很好,没什么. 要成长过程中难免会遇到这些问题的, 我自己也应该学着如何去面对, 而不是一直靠你们啊.

其实, 听妈妈的话是没有错的. 父母说的话其实是没有错的, 越来越大了, 才会了解他们的苦心.

Whatever title la....

2009-12-13T03:58:00.000-08:00

What a boring boring day you know?Classes finished already,stay at home doing nothing.Lazy to go out as in the weather HOT until I beh tahan.>< Yala,what also I cannot tahan mia.LOL.

Cannot believe that sem 3 already come to and end,LOL.Did I learnt anything this sem??Hmmm...let me think.Been through the 'Form 5' situation again,become more lazy...and what else??'wink' Oh ya,I know!! Learnt some new dishes from Chin and Tzu@@ Yeap,thats right.

Classes finished dy have more time to cook,eat,sleep...eat and sleep...Gosh!! put on more weight already lah...Geez,better put on more,when i go back to Malaysia,the hot freaking weather will burn off all my 'lemak'....XD

Anyway,now is the time to cook again!!! Ping pong piang~~~~

就这样吧!

2009-12-08T23:45:00.000-08:00

要怎么开始我想说的东西呢? 我也不知道, 就知道想写些什么.

又要在blog这里骂人吗? 很没有力气骂了. 要再埋怨吗? 我的生活已经很完美了, 为什么还要怨三嫌四呢?

这几天没有再花时间在想着同样的事情, 跟朋友聊起也不会再觉得隐隐做痛了, 晚上也能一觉到天明, 也不会再发呆.

很多东西是需要很大的勇气才做得到, 拿得起固然要放得下. 我很勇敢的拿了起来, 放下的时候百般的不舍, 可是还是做个这个决定.

嗯…..只是认为已经没感觉了, 不会痛, 不会哭, 不会生气, 不会关心…什么都不会了. 已经不需要了. 看到的, 听到的…也无所谓了..

我,

曾经付出过, 曾经爱过, 曾经快乐过, 曾经学习过, 曾经珍惜过……

我们还有曾经, 虽然不是什么天长地久, 可是…..我已经拥有过了. 那为什么我还要再埋怨呢? 为什么我还要觉得生气呢? 这一切已经不重要了. 不再在乎别人怎么说, 别人怎么想了.

生命苦短, 我只想珍惜身边的一切, 我不会再认为所有事情的发生都是不公平都是别人的错. 我只想一切就这样子, 就这样吧!

我不恨了, 也不介意了, 也不伤心了. 一切就让它随着时间过去…….

祝福你快乐, 幸福和健康.

^^

2009-12-06T08:18:00.000-08:00

Time passed,

I will be better in time,

Evn im still doubt of myself,

but what i did is correct,

at least it was good for me...^^

cheers!!

good post frm her...

2009-12-03T09:24:00.000-08:00

人生中有太多的选择，

我们从还不懂事的时候就已经被逼做出选择。

当我们还小时，我们需要选，到底我的娃娃比较美丽还是姐姐的？

当我们长大一些，我们要选，小明整天和我吵架，到底还要不要跟他做朋友？

当我们上小学，我们还得选，小丽那班人叫我不要跟小花好，我到底该跟谁好？

上我们上中学，我们得选，该选理科好呢？还是文科？

选了理科文科，以为可以安安心心不用在两年内做什么大的选择时，

我们却要选，选帅帅的A君做男朋友好呢？还是成绩一列前茅的B君？

很快的，又是选大学的时候了。

本地大学好，还是外国大学？

应该读医生还是律师？

应该留下来读中六还是去学院？

当你作了你认为是人生中最大的决定时，

你却发现，上了大学，你要做的决定更多。

应该和那个很帅的C君一起，还是那个有钱的D君好呢？还是应该和前度复合？

应该买这个牌子的鞋子好呢还是另一个的？

应该这个那个还是那样这样？

这时我们开始怨了，

为什么当初我那么冲动买了这个，回到家后却不喜欢了。

为什么当初我会选那个男生，对，他是帅，可是他很花心，见一个爱一个，

为什么当时我不听大家的劝告而选择了过这样的生活？

为什么当时那么愚昧，被他三言两语就答应把第一次交给他？

过后，我们开始想了很多的‘如果’，

如果我当时没有选这科，那我就不用那么辛苦了。

如果我那时没有买那个，我就够钱买这个了。

如果之前不是选择他而是另一个他，我就可以很幸福了。

如果那天没有和他发生关系，我就可以轻易放下他了。

从选择，抱怨，后悔，然后再选择，抱怨，后悔 ...

这样的生活，大家应该都很熟悉吧？

既然如此，那为什么我们就是不肯选择走出这个圈子，

做出另一个选择呢？

* 我要做下一个选择了。

Taken from a fren's blog...meaningful^^

有些人

2009-12-01T08:55:00.000-08:00

有些人想要得到一样东西却怎么也得不到,

有些人想不要一样东西却偏偏得到同样的东西,

有些人为了很小的事就雀跃万分,

有些人即使很完美了还是不开心,

有些人劝了很多次还是不会听,

有些人不用劝都会知道自己在做什么,

有些人被伤害过一次就永远都不敢踏入同样的陷阱,

有些人明知道是没有结果的可是还是要一步一步走进去,

有些人从来做东西都不会考虑到别人的感受,

有些人伤心的时候想要找一个朋友倾诉,

有些人外表很坚强可是却躲在背后哭泣,

有些人享受一个人独处的时候,

有些人没有热闹的场景绝对不行,

有些人花一辈子都不会忘记一个人,

有些人宁愿不去想就这样让时间淡化.

你又是不是我提到的’ 有些人’?

Dream

2009-11-28T10:00:00.000-08:00

Honestly,

was that really you??I have been waited for so long.

You don;t understand when I saw that name...

What happened?? However,I don't think it was you.It was just a joke......

I don't know what title...

2009-11-25T08:57:00.000-08:00

原来我真正想一件事情时是在冲凉的时候, 每次冲凉都冲了一个多小时.

迟早应该会有风湿…>< ‘touch wood’

平时都在做自己的东西, 与朋友聊天. 原来我是一个很爱想可是又什么都做不到的人. 应该是说我遗传到妈妈的性格, 喜欢想东想西. 有些东西真的是什么也做不到的, 只能等时间过或者就接受事实罢了. 所谓:Everything happens for a reason. 也不能有什么多余的抱怨, 抱怨得多, 生活也不会过得开心.

要学着怎么去放下执着已久的东西, 也许失忆是最好的, 就那么一个小片段. 曾经他告诉我, 人总是特别记得在辛苦, 艰难的时刻. 对, 他说得真的没有错, ; 快乐的时刻真的很多, 可是要真正说出一个倒是有点难. 最痛苦的时候, 还真的是铭记不忘.

说真的我还是放不下…不能就是不能. 我也不想骗着别人和自己我已经完全的放开, 放下. 这一次又不懂要用多久才可以完全康复. 旧戏重演, 也许真的要用很长的时间. 有人说短短两个月不算什么, 可是对我来说, 这个人不一样, 这个人带给我的感觉真的很难解释.

I heart this song,Aerosmith-I dont wanna miss a thing

2009-11-24T09:53:00.000-08:00

I could stay awake just to hear you breathing
Watch you smile while you are sleeping
Far away and dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
I could stay lost in this moment forever
Well, every moment spent with you
Is a moment I treasure

I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing

Lying close to you
Feeling your heart beating
And I'm wondering what you're dreaming
Wondering if it's me you're seeing
Then I kiss your eyes and thank God we're together
And I just wanna stay with you
In this moment forever, forever and ever

I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing

男主角女主角

2009-11-23T09:25:00.000-08:00

剧本里, 本来已经大结局.

偏偏还要学别人搞什么续局的…

男主角本来就不应该再出现, 女主角也自奔前程.

女主角只想生活过得简简单单, 男主角却要生活多姿多彩, 什么都要尝试才对自己过得去.

剧中出现的配角也越来越多, 女主角到最后选择了逃脱.

男主角到现在也还不知道女主角要的是什么, 需要的是什么. 有些要求, 看来越是简单越是做不到. 女主角终于明白承诺是不可以信口开河的, 做不到还是别答应.

痛…可是生活还是要过…一个人承担固然难受, 可是好比两个人在一起的煎熬来得轻松.

越走越远, 海阔天空

A friend

2009-11-21T09:29:00.000-08:00

I read his blog just now,just realised that he is kinda suffering right now.I understand the feeling,but none of us can do anything bout it. I just wish that everything can be fine for him.

He is one of my friend that i knew from just Friendster,17,young and making friends through the net. Alot of things happened between us, bad timing,blah blah blah..too long to talk about. But he is still a special friend to me.

Just hope that everthing will be fine for him and he will get what he wanted so badly^^

真心真意

2009-11-19T09:13:00.000-08:00

真心真意对待一个人, 为的只不过是希望他也会真心真意的对待你. 付出的真心, 未必会得到一样的回报.

好心真的会有好报吗? 现在才明白真心不一定会被珍惜. 那种感觉我想你是不会了解的吧! 如果你了解就不会是这样的结果.

我付出了真心, 不后悔. 也看得更清楚你是个怎么样的人.

When It All Falls Apart

2009-11-10T08:30:00.000-08:00

I'm having the day from hell,
it was all going so well,before you came

And you told me you needed space,
With a kiss on the side my face,not again
And not to mention the tears I shed
But I should have kicked your ass instead
I need intervention
Attention to to stop temptation to scream

'cause baby

Everything is F'ed up straight from the heart
Tell me what do you do, when it all falls apart
Gotta pick myself up where do I start
'cause I can't turn to you when it all falls apart
No

Don't know where I parked my car
Don't know who my real friends are anymore
I put my faith in you
What a stupid thing to do when it rains it pours
And not to mention I drank too much
I'm feeling hung over and out of touch
I need intervention
Attention to to stop temptation to scream

'cause baby

Can it be easier?
Can I just change my life?
'cause it just seems to go bad everytime
Will I be mending?
another one ending once again

Falls apart
Gotta pick myself up 'cause things are messed up

Quote

2009-11-09T09:37:00.000-08:00

The more hurt and pain you have gone thru in life, the stronger and more
beautiful your heart will be.....

2009-11-08T08:47:00.000-08:00

一个月了喔….坦白说我还是没有彻底的放开, 那份感觉, 那份执着还是存在着. 时间或许真的是最好的良药.

其实是我不想放下, 不想接受事实还是太过于执着? 原来是这样难的, 而且只对那么一个人.

我看到全部的东西, 那暧昧在流动, 我真的看到. 看过了也不知道应该怎么做, 很不想去相信. 可是就是事实.

有也烦没有也烦, 不想去在乎任何关于你的事了.

2009-11-07T08:58:00.000-08:00

I can say, finally!my exam finished today.At least for my mid term 1,i can say tat second year and first year have a big big big gap.Second year can kill people and take away my life..Seriously==

This one la,that one la..if u read my fb status then you will know.I have no comment at all.
Last nite i talked to this person that I just know for a few months,he is a nice person and he told me alot of stuff.I felt better after i talked to him,and its true enuf that life is just too short to hate a person or be sad over small things.

Anyway,im learning now.Still in the process.Life is short,shuld have just let everything be in a flow and treasure everyone beside me.I will let go every hateful feelings,and I will just be myself. I want to be happy.

What to do?

2009-11-04T08:35:00.000-08:00

为什么还会有心痛的感觉,?为什么还会在乎? 为什么还是看得见? 为什么? 我不想问这些问题, 问了也不会有答案. 我到底是勇敢还是笨蛋? 我想我是笨蛋吧!

眼泪决堤,

以为自己已经没事了, 完全放开了. 可是到后来才发现原来我又错了. 眼泪告诉我我错了. 我还很自信的告诉他们我已经没事了, 可以这样忘记一却. 这个复元了的疤痕, 想不到又再次被撕开. 撕开了我想更难结了. 其实我知道是错的, 我知道是不值得的, 我知道结果还是一样. 谎言从来就没有减少过, 只有一次比一次来得多, 来得毫无防备. 是美丽的谎言, 我相信了这些谎言, 以为是真的, 以为已经改变了, 到最后原来只是我的错觉, 只是我的 “以为” 罢了.

如果我不会再觉得痛就好了………

RIP

2009-11-04T08:29:00.000-08:00

那一晚, 我失眠了.

以为这一却都是假的, 以为不是她, 以为不是我认识的她, 可是这个事实实在是太残酷了. 我还来不及接受, 她就已经离开了这个世界.

我们曾经在佛教会搞过很多活动, 曾经很快乐的在一起谈天, 曾经….曾经….要我说一天也说不完. 虽然中五后我很少再参与活动了, 可是从来就没有忘记过她. 她美丽的容颜, 她灿烂的笑容, 她开朗的性格, 我从来就不曾忘记过.

可是我万万也没有想她就这样, 毫无征兆, 就离开了大家. 怎么会是她? 我的心情非笔墨就能形容的. 多么的感慨, 多么的伤心, 多么的怀念….

“诗盈, 虽然我们不是很常联络的朋友, 可是我希望你在另一个世界会活得更开心. 我会永远记得你这个朋友, 一路好走. 你永远都是我心中的快乐天使.”

One fine day

2009-10-28T03:20:00.000-07:00

Today is my best day ever,stay at home doing nothing for the whole day.

Too much of studies and exams few weeks back.

Finally can santai and santai(relax)!!!!!Hahaha...

Watch movie la,TvB drama and wake up extremely late..

Going to Cc2 later,nice stuff to eat again..Owww.....can't wait..hehe.

Last nite,it came to me again.Suddenly~~I wrote it in my diary and kept it..I will always keep that in my diary.

I hope everyday will be like this...no worries,no exam,no study,no labs,no homework..But it is so impossible ><

今晚

2009-10-25T10:28:00.000-07:00

很夜了, 还不想睡, 不能睡. 现在的你在做些什么呢?

脑海里, 他写给她的那封信还在盘旋. 觉得很感动, 很简单, 看似很简单的一些文句, 可是就这样深深烙印在我心中. 替他们开心, 身为朋友的我会给予无限的支持.

心原本是平静的, 可是却因为一些事情而有了一阵阵的涟漪. 不平静, 不能够用言语来解释, 也不要有多余的想象.

太多的如果, 太多的变数, 太多的话都不能说出口, 太多的想法.

喜欢冷冷的夜晚, 心总是那么的宁静, 可是…今晚…就是不一样.

想说什么就说咯!

2009-10-24T02:56:00.000-07:00

今天躲在家哪里都不想去,

已经好久都不够睡眠了, 眼袋很深, 皮肤也很粗糙.

还有多两科, 我就可以休息休息和出去疯一下. 呵呵~

把房间打扫一遍, 好像已经两个星期都没打扫了, 整个地方变成猪窝一样. 头发一大堆, 垃圾象山一样高, 书本到处丢, 简直象个垃圾场一样.

生活忙碌, 不知不觉也过了两个星期. 没有想起是骗人的可是现在有的都只是回忆.

我总是没有别人那么的幸运, 付出努力也不见得得到很好的成果. 就欠缺那么一点点的幸运吧! 我想…..付出的从来不会等于收回.

我问她: 是不是好人就一定会有好事发生?

她回答: 对, 只要你做好事就会有好报. 每样事情的发生都会有一定的理由, 只要你肯相信, 好事一定会发生.

我说: 那为什么每个人说我是个好女孩可是却遇到那么多困难?

她无奈的告诉我: 我也不知道, 我也不知道该怎样回答你. 或许上天要让你学习, 要让你变得更坚强

无奈, 很无奈….无奈没有完美的结局. “在爱情里,好人总比坏人狼狈, 我却还是绝不会狠心对谁.”

天空阴阴的可是又不下雨, 好多天没有下雨了. 好像倾听雨天交响曲, 好像亲吻雨水的味道. 我爱下雨天, 可是怎么都不下雨. 很不能顶啊!! 热到天天都去买凉茶.

有些事情发生了就不能再回头, 不能再改变. 有些事情我还需要时间去平衡, 有些歌听起来特别的悦耳, 有些人看起来特别顺眼, 有些东西明知道是不应该的可是还会再重复去做. 累了还要继续, 痛了还要忍, 肚子饿了….当然要吃啦! ^^

电话我忍着不打, 以免变成习惯. 不再去看, 不再去听, 不再去留意, 不再去关心这样我觉好..

Give me some air!!

2009-10-23T10:19:00.000-07:00

Its been a long while since i updated my blog.

Damn lazy and i got no time,i don't even have enough time to sleep.Gosh!!!

Why study in ITB is so so so hard??I feel like im some sort of study machine that study non-stop for 24 hours,which i can't,obviously.LOL

I thought im strong,but in fact Im not that strong.I can tell people to be strong and be tough but i cannot apply it to myself.Pathetic~~Geezzz

I just want to have some kind of miracle happens to me or whatever luck.Im sick of this,really sick of this.Study la,exam la,met the wrong person la,made a wrong decision la....Just whatever la!! @@

because of you

2009-10-13T07:51:00.001-07:00

对你我才会那么的勇敢,

曾经因为你而受过伤.

认为不会再见到你, 不会再爱上你.

天意弄人,

短短的几个月就这样分开了.

因为你, 我学会了如何去忍耐.

因为你, 我才了解我是真心的爱你.

我们是不适合? 没有缘分? 还是本来就不应该在一起?

很痛, 真的很痛…

习惯晚上睡觉手机不放静音模式, 就是为了不要错过与你通话.

习惯迟睡也就是要等你到家了才放心.

习惯出门和回家都通知你.

习惯……太多的习惯.

要放下, 觉得很困难.

不后悔, 却留下了遗憾.

还爱你, 需要时间.

无奈, 你和我都没有美好的结局.

“除了你之外的空白, 还有谁能来叫我勇敢?”---- 失落沙洲

Painful but FINALLY

2009-10-12T03:15:00.000-07:00

Yup,i already made up my mind.

I can't bear it any longer,this is not the relationship i want.

Im much more happy then.

I gave chances to you,but you don't give a shit bout it and u don't even care.

Ok fine.

Its not your fault neither am I.

We are juz not suitable for each other.

Anyway,good luck to u in your life and i wish you can be happy and get what you want.

Thought of the day

2009-10-09T23:06:00.000-07:00

Guess that time is rushing now,

and i haven't start anything.

Im scare and nervous as usual,but i just don't have enogh time.

Busy time will make me forget,forget what that makes me feel sad and down.

What is the best solution?i have no idea.

walao

2009-10-07T06:52:00.000-07:00

Hmmm,what to say??

Everyday also very busy,tired and stress.Study in ITB is not that easy.

Today 2 labs,2ml class for half day non-stop,Fri 2 labs again..and Saturday Botany field trip..zzz.Monday is Organice CHem UTS1..Guess what?NO STUDY WEEK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What to do???ITB mah...LOL

昨晚艳问我会觉得委屈吗? 坦白说, 我很委屈.

累了谁也想要有个人的支持和关怀. 谁不想? 可是…..可是….就有个可是……应该明白吧! 话不用说得那么明白, 直接.

唉…..很压力啊!

learning process

2009-10-05T09:29:00.000-07:00

好久没有update我的blog了, 懒惰了吧!

开学到现在好像还挺悠闲的, 虽然知道功课是像山一样高, 连考试也近在眉睫, 可是还是像只猪天天睡到日上山竿. 呵呵~

最近万隆开始下雨了, 我很开心啊! 天天下雨, 天天想你, 天天问自己, 问自己同样的问题.

我也没有茹盈的忍耐力, 我没有恋晴那么不在乎别人的看法,我没有薇艳那么敢做敢为, 我没有静盈那么成熟的思想,我没有祖丽那么想法简单, 我没有丽晶那么开朗豁达, 我没有淑雯那么坚强, 我也没有男生们那么一颗撑得住一却的心.我只是我, 再怎么的说服自己不要去看, 不去问, 不去听…还是做不到. 有时很羡慕她们, 要不是她们我想我还是天天哭泣吧! 嘻嘻.

10个里只有1个是我想听到的答案, 该怎么形容我自己我也不懂, 很苯? 很傻? 我想应该只有我一个人能做到. 朋友骂我, 给我劝告, 可是我还是一头.. 栽下去, 毫不保留? 毫不思考后果? 对! 我可以说很对. 我已经盲了, 聋了, 什么都不懂了. 只知道现在的我有过于别人的勇气, 我的勇气吞噬的原本的我. 我也开始有些害怕了.

问题一箩箩,可是我还是决定带着笑脸去迎接每一天, 生活开不开心是掌握在自己的手中, 想太多是我最大的缺点. 现在的我在学着怎么放开胸怀, 忍一时风平浪静, 退一步海阔天空.

我真的还能相信吗? 说能是骗人的, 但我还在学习中.

2009-10-02T10:03:00.000-07:00

Ain's birthday today,Happy Birthday to her..^^We had a great time tonite.

Caryn's birthday tomorrow,Happy Birthday and Happy Mooncake Festival.

I just pray that everything will be fine and we all can be happy.

My problems will not be solve if im the only one that make an effort.@@

I just hope my friends will be happy and my family is fine.

Patience

2009-09-30T09:13:00.000-07:00

Im patient enough to wait,

Im patient enough to let things happen again and again,

Im patient enough to listen to what you say,

Im patient enough to control my temper,

Im patient enough to listen to your excuses over and over again,

Im patient enough to handle everything by myself,

Im patient enough to pray and hope everything will be fine even i know it's not,

Im patient enough....patient enough to get hold of this....

I don't know how I can be patient like this,when it will be better?

I don't know..leave it to God.

不知道

2009-09-29T10:50:00.000-07:00

有些事情, 怎么说, 怎么去了解, 都不会改变.

原来改变一个人, 一件事是这样艰难的.

已经尽了力, 已经浪费了时间.

我还有什么是能做的? 坚持到底?

我也不知道还可以做些什么.

.....

2009-09-27T08:36:00.000-07:00

So hard to understand,

It came to my mind but i just can't figure it out.

Is it so hard?I will try my best to manage it.

It's tough baby,TOUGH!!

Let it be

2009-09-25T09:35:00.000-07:00

"You are nice,

You are sweet,

But im little bit naive with my heart"

She said......

"If you are not into true love,stop bugging my life"

She said.....

"I just can't let it go like that"

I don't know what else i can do"

She said.....

"Let it be....let it be"

"There is nothing you can do"

I said.............

No idea,no comment

2009-09-24T20:37:00.000-07:00

Im still confuse,

Chances?Ya...

M.O.I.S

2009-09-20T07:29:00.000-07:00

每天吵着要去clubbing, 昨晚终于给我去到了. 跟我好朋友, 晴, 她的男友, 一大班朋友一起去槟城的Mois.

不太会喝酒, 只想去享受音乐和跳舞. 好久没有这样疯狂了. 印尼的club我不是很喜欢, 所以应该不会再去了.呵呵..

里面还挺复杂的, 喝醉的喝醉, 嗑药的嗑药…我只喝了几杯, 不敢多喝. 要时时都保持清醒. 我都是在自己的世界里.

一点多就去dear那一桌, 遇到很多很久没见的朋友, 有dear在, 我觉得比较安全些. 哈~

开始觉得不太喜欢这种地方了, 久久去一次还可以, 要我每个星期去我应该会闷死.

感觉到的都还算不错, 不过也还有点纳闷…><

假期慢点再结束吧!! 时间再走慢点吧!

Pray

2009-09-17T22:04:00.000-07:00

Oh God,i don't know what to do.

Please help me...that's all i wish for.

I'm.....I want to...

2009-09-15T03:29:00.000-07:00

I'm...

-lazy but happy

-happy but bored

-bored but enjoying

-enjoying but lonely

-lonely but in love

I want to...

-shop till i drop

-go out and have a movie

-clubbing

-have super duper hot.........(secret) *wink*

-have never ending holiday ;(

..................

2009-09-14T07:54:00.000-07:00

突然觉得很复杂,

不同的人, 不同的时间, 不同的地点.

为什么你的生活不能简单一点?

我觉得有点害怕,

担心你还是一样那么的复杂.

自己做的事应该要负责,

也应该要懂得怎么想了.

你怎么不能让我对你有信赖的感觉?

你对每个人都一样那么的好, 好到让我很不自在.

我还是我……你还是你……

BFF

2009-09-13T07:43:00.000-07:00

In Malaysia now,I come back this time mainly because of my best friend.I can't come back for her wedding,so i gonna come back and spend time with her.

*Sigh*....My best best friend for 10 years,she is such an amazing friend as she can manage everything by herself,she is strong and she be there for me 24/7.She will give me advices in love,friends,fashion and anything that can be mention.However,I can't manage to attend her wedding,how sad is it...

I will love her,support her and will accompany her throughout her life.Wish for her happiness and health.

Come to me holiday

2009-09-10T09:09:00.000-07:00

Tahan for one more day,then HOLIDAY!!!But now i already in holiday mood la.Don't feel like doing pre lab assignment.haha.

One more day,one more day!!hehe.I wish...just wish...................................

距离

2009-09-09T08:32:00.000-07:00

进一步就是退
退在你影子覆盖范围
你看的事情多绝对
绝对没有容许犯错的机会

退一步就是追
追赶被你侵犯的机会
我留的空间越绝对
越看出你想要拥抱的意味

而我在猜你会怎麽做
当你失落意志力薄弱
除非是我在你的耳边诉说
弥补一个人的虚空

我们现在远距离的恋爱
我是否该放松我的期待

除非是我熟悉你身体的脉博需要最深邃的安慰
让我贴进你最柔软的心扉
只有我才能将你的好坏
都拥有

我们现在远距离的恋爱
我是否该坦白我的关怀

如果是我在你的耳边诉说
能否弥补两个人的虚空

而我在猜你会怎麽做
当你满足不了你的欲求

除非是我熟悉你身体的脉博需要最深邃的安慰
让我贴进你最柔软的心扉
只有我才能将我们的距离都占有

退一步就是追
追赶被你侵犯的机会

你留的空间除非是我
才能将我们的距离都占有

haiyo!!!

2009-09-08T09:58:00.000-07:00

I wish that i can be more clever,and i can absorb everything in split seconds.Alot of stuff that needs to study is driving me crazy,i have not started anything until now except studied for pre lab test.However,alot need to study for Organic Chem lab tomorrow.Haiz....i want this week to finish faster,faster and faster!!!zzzzz..But i went for facial today,damn pain.My tears rolled down from my cheek as when the therapist picit out my pimples and blackheads..OUCH!!now my face still red..==

I don't know how la...yer~~~This is my day la,and i feel bored bored bored!!

Nagreg+Sierra Cafe

2009-09-07T06:01:00.000-07:00

It will be my last week in Bandung as in Im going back for Raya holiday,miss my family,friends and dear so much.Want to go back and eat the delicious foods..hehe.

Hilwa's bf,Tiger a.k.a Afiq came down to Bandung,and he invited Caryn,Satbeer and myself to spend time together.We went by a hired car and there was another girl followed us,she is our newly known friend from Tokyo,Japan.She has this wonderful name,Keiko and she is damn pretty and Kawaiii..hehe.

The place we went is 1 hour from Bandung and it called Nagreg,I don't really know exactly the place but it is not as cold as in Bandung.We went to Pak Asep Strowberi,they served Sundanese cuisine.The atmospher was nice and calm.All of us had Flyting Fox~~WEE~~~I screamed to the top of my voice,it was my first time of course.But it was totally fun.

Had nasi liwet,ayam bakar,sup buntut and etc as dinner,kinda filling.Chit chat and bragged alot.haha.Went to Dago Atas Sierra Cafe.WOW!!Damn cold and we all were freezing,but again we have lots of fun.

I hope can upload photos which we took after i back in Malaysia..hehe.I want the time to fly..hehe.

今天, 雨天, 星期天

2009-09-05T23:44:00.000-07:00

早上起身, 又过了一天, 每天都做着同样的事.
上课, 吃饭, 睡觉, 聊聊天….

觉得生活有些枯燥乏味, 不知道还有什么可以做了.

我赖在床上不想起来,
因为起来了就要想今天午餐要煮些什么, 还有什么功课要完成, 什么东西要收拾, 哎~真的很没趣.

躺在床上翻来覆去, 每天都想着同样的事情, 到了今天还是在想着.
生活忙碌让我不再去执着于同样的东西, 顺其自然还是很重要.

这里天气炎热, 心情也挺烦燥的.

每天都在期待我的雨天,
我喜欢雨天,
虽然很多人都讨厌雨天, 可是我特别喜欢雨天.
冷冷的, 可以让我心情快乐些.

雨天~雨天~
我期待的雨天在? 哪里?

再多几个月吧!
昨晚等不到的今天会等到吗?
今天又是星期天,
还是很开心的过着每一天,
还是等着奇迹的发生.

Earthquake!!Experienced it myself.

2009-09-02T08:38:00.000-07:00

See the title?Earthquake?Yes baby!!No joking or kidding or whatever..It's real,and it happened in front of my eyes.

Was having a damn boring Organic lab introduction,it was hot in the lab and dusty and sleepy.Talking was what we did for the whole introduction,after it finished.Me,Tzu and Caryn wanna go BIP hunting for groceries.While we were at the Dayang Sumbi and Jalan Dago junction,i felt dizzy,really dizzy,and caryn shouted that the ground is moving.Shaked from left to right,just goyang like that,the people ran out from the buildings and the traffic was in chaos.Huh...but unfortunately,3 of us were excited.I know it was bad and people died,but i just cant help it as we never know what it is.

Went to BIP,all the stores closed and we nicely sat down at J.Co drinking capuccino la,eating donut la,chatting la..XD We waited until the hypermart opened.

It happened just like that,and people died.Just pray that everything will be fine.

Life?

2009-08-31T08:20:00.000-07:00

It seems yesterday when everything happen,

Confused?

Same old things happen again and make me feel bored of it.

Cant stand it any longer.

What i really want?I don't know.

You can blame me for saying 'don't know' all the time,but if i really know,i will say know.

Life is not that easy and smooth going.

This is life...

complicated

2009-08-29T09:37:00.000-07:00

你问我什么是爱情? 要我怎么回答你嘛?

这门学问我已经学了4,5年可是还是一窍不通, 总是处在难以抉择的情况或矛盾的心情.

从暗恋, 相恋. 吵架到分手, 每个阶段都非同凡响. 也许察觉不到你已经因为爱情而改变, 可是爱情带来的影响也不小. 跌倒了还是可以站起来.

伤心, 流泪, 心痛, 心碎到过渡期, 不是每个人都有勇气做得到.

拿得起未必放得下, 承诺算什么? 只会说不会做也等于零, 不要给予希望却又让你的另一伴失望. 有时候希望放得越高, 失落感越大.

爱过就不要后悔, 选择是自己的不是别人帮你做的选择, 路要怎么走得要靠双方怎么付出.

每段感情不曾后悔, 留下的只有遗憾, 不想自己受伤害却但又伤了不该伤的人. 伤口需要时间痊愈, 有时几个月, 有时几年. 在对的时间遇到错的人, 在错的时间遇到对的人.

在他面前可是却得不到关怀, 感觉不到那份爱, 很多的话还是说不出口. 只有她知道那份滋味是如何. 问太多被说想太多, 讲太多被说很长气. 要的只不过是安全感和肯定. 开不了口只因她爱他, 愿意迁就与妥协. 以前只会对他埋怨, 现在只会保持沉默.不想怀疑他也不想要多心. 破镜真的能重圆? 还是一直都会有裂缝?只不过何时他才会让她感受到份爱和真诚?

爱过, 所以领悟到当中的道理. 爱过, 所以回忆里有了甜蜜. 爱过, 所以不曾后悔. 爱过, 所以希望你们会更快乐. 爱过, 才懂得更珍惜你.

每个人有不同的爱情故事, 苦涩的过去, 甜蜜的现在, 未知的将来, 应该有吧?

答应你的东西会做到, 希望你也一样. 心没有因为这遥远的距离而有一丝的动摇, 才知道原来只要决心做一样东西没什么是不能的.

以前没那么坚决, 心还是抵不过诱惑, 错过了才懂得掉泪, 痛过了才懂得坚强, 哭过了才懂得微笑.

要开心, 要努力, 要加油, 决不后悔! 每天都要活得精彩..

For HER

2009-08-28T22:16:00.000-07:00

放在桌上的咖啡热腾腾的, 但却没有仔细的品尝.

等到冷了才发现原来味道没有热咖啡来得美味.

不同的心情, 想法, 要的也自然不一样.

起司蛋糕吃起来有淡淡的奶油味却又不失浓郁的香味,

但吃久了还是会觉得腻.

选择的还是冰淇淋蛋糕, 冷冷的,但不断的回味那含在口里的舒适感.

昂望天空中漂浮不定的云朵,

难以预测今天的天气,

会是晴天? 雨天? 还是阴天..

今天天气晴朗却不能保证下一秒不会下雨.

如果可以,

天空会是永远晴朗的.

手上那条线越放越长,

风筝会不会被强风吹走还是个未知数.

只想要风筝待在身边的她也不知道应该如何是好.

凉风习习,

吹着的却是一颗纳闷心.

不安的心情笼罩着窗边的小花儿,

花儿开得再美再灿烂也比不了她那落寞的眼神.

漂泊在海中央的船只何时才会靠岸?

或许船只只想停留在属于它的港口,

一直保持沉默是它的专利.

她要走的路还很远很崎岖吧!

我真心的祝福她.

Question+answer?

2009-08-28T22:07:00.000-07:00

I have repeated the same questions again and again in my mind,but where is my answer?Or i already had the answer but i didn’t even realised it.The answer is not convincing and i gotta try a new way to find my answer.When i get the answer will i stop myself for being too addicted to the subject?Or will i continue bury myself in that confusing and tough subject that i couldn’t even get an ‘A’?I don’t know,you don’t know and he don’t know either..

Life

2009-08-26T05:40:00.000-07:00

Life is not that easy i supposed,complicated stuff always happen.I just want a simple and interesting life,but it turns out to be kinda complicated sometimes.Unexpected things and problems always happen,even you try to stay out of it and try to be alert.However,eventually,will get into the situation without realising it.

I tried to avoid this,but it still happens.The interesting part is i don't know why and how it happened.I just feel 'geram'...><

I pray for simplicity and i hope everything will be smooth for me.God Help Me~~

2009-08-23T02:18:00.000-07:00

新学期已经开始了一个星期, 可是还没真正的上一堂课. 还很混乱的, 课室没有或是时间表不合.

没什么事可以做的, 都是一直出去而已, 在家还是挺闷的. 想要开始读书, 可是根本不知道要读些什么.

在家就谈天和上网, 超闷的. 这边的mall来去去就是那几间, 才回到两个星期可是已经去PVJ 三次了.@@ 去pub和bar也蛮多次了, 可是绝对不能喝到醉. 昨晚和一班朋友喝到有点醉醺醺, 还说了很多傻话. 哈哈.. 家乡的朋友都不太会喝酒, 平时也很少去喝, 包括我, 喝了那么多次有时还会吐. 我嘛, 不是很乖乖女也不是很坏女孩. 有时很喜欢耍坏, 有时父母管教严格还是有所限制. 我很爱玩也很喜欢去夜店, 就跟朋友去嘛! 只不过来到印尼, 这边的夜店不怎么让我投入, 我和这边的大学朋友都相约回去大马后要去mois. 哈! 还很久.. 不过在这边太闷了啦! 专心读书吧

新学期绝对不要再浪费掉时间在无所谓的东西, 也不想再一直看戏和出去玩了. 应该做些有意义的东西, 嘻嘻^^

虽然有时觉得很辛苦, 不过我还是坚持到现在, 我相信只要有心还是能成功, 只有这一样事让我坚持到现在. 就只有这一个理由吧!Im addicted to it!Addicted to it badly..

My day la

2009-08-18T09:01:00.000-07:00

I thought the class today will be fun,but end up doing nothing insteed of sat on the class and gossiping..I was excited this morning,woke up early and dressed up everything prepared for my first Botany class,half way to ITB,got a call from Ah Lai,class cancelled!!!SHIT..So dissapointed,and headed home.

Another class at 1pm but unfortunately,cancelled again.haiz..sat at Pharmacy building and chit chat with Caryn.Talk bout guys and bf,same old topic again and again..haha.

4pm Physical Pharmacy class was short and dun even start a class yet.haha.Dinner at Tubagus senior house,juniors and seniors all were there.The foods very delicious and the people are nice..hehe.

Now only i realised that i can be so determined in maintain this relationship..XD

2009-08-13T21:35:00.000-07:00

My first week at bandung is quite ok..watched DVD,korean drama,and hot guys..haha.Went out to PVJ just to buy some stuff and watched movie.Blah..nothing special.Guess have to wait until all my friends come back.^^

I seriously don't know,don't know what's goin to happen to me.But after having talk with my frens i was happy and i shuld have faith.Thanx..now im better.wew~~

2nd day

2009-08-11T10:56:00.000-07:00

Second day in Bandung,already did all the registration prosedure,kinda easy,but tiring.haha.Met some of the juniors and transfer credit students.They look nice but don't really know them yet.haha. cant online using my own laptop,i duno what the heck happen to my laptop settings,i cant even online.==

Watched my first movie here since i came here this new semester.Up was a nice and funny movie,recommended to all of u.hehe.Still got alot of stuff that i need to get use to it.Haiz...Today i not even get a message from him,i gues its the connection problem or whatever.I still need to get use to it,or else it will be very hard for me.

I already get to know my new semester schedule.It KILLs me!!!I got 3 weeks per week if i was not mistaken,and during Friday i got lab from 7 to 11am,continue my Religion and Ethic subject from 11am to 1pm,and continue with Botany lab from 1pm to 5pm!!Wish me luck please!haha.God Bless Me~XD

You are all this to me

2009-08-08T08:38:00.000-07:00

You're the thought that starts each morning
the conclusion to my day.

You are all in I do and everything I say.
You're the smile on my face the twinkle in my eye.
The warmth inside my heart and the fullness in my life.

You're the hand laced im mine,
and the coat upon my back.
My friend,
my shoulder to lean on.

You're silly, mature, caring ,thoughtful, and bright .
The one who holds me tightly when I need to cry.

You're the dimple to my cheek
the ever constant tingle in my soul
The voice that makes me weak
the hapiness of my life.

You are all I've ever wanted.
You are all I need
You are all I've dreamed of
You are all this to me

lost

2009-08-07T01:39:00.000-07:00

最近,
总觉得失去些什么,

想来想去还是一样很重要的东西.

想起来了,

我的天!!
怎么办?
我不小心把它弄丢了..

弄丢了也没得到一丝丝的安慰,
对别人来说也许是理所当然的吧!

明明就感觉不到,
为什么还要学别人耍潇洒?
明明就不安,
为什么还要学别人故作冷静?
明明就……
明明就……
太多的'明明就了'啊!

偶尔那架手机的信息铃声响起,
我的手会颤抖,
心也一阵凉,
虽然有时只是小事一桩.

失去的也不可能找得回,
只要不再失去倒是足够了.

road

2009-07-30T01:50:00.000-07:00

路,
还很远吧!

走到累了可不可以休息?

有时很开心,
有时很快乐,
有时很害怕,
有时很胆怯………

可是,
我会很坚强的吧!
我选择的也是我的.

走吧! 跑吧! 去吧!

......

2009-07-28T22:22:00.000-07:00

Alot of questions in my head which i haven't get answers...Asking is not a best solution,time will tell me the answer.

Honestly,i will try my best this time.It will be my last time too.If it happen again,i will accept it as how i accepted it long time ago.

I don't have the passion anymore.

sleepless night

2009-07-22T10:00:00.000-07:00

Sleepless night.....Its dull

The sky without stars,night without laughter.Silent night...

Guess that i expecting too much.I waited for quite sometimes but things doesn't change,finally i have choosen another path.The path where lead me to a PLACE that i don't know,that i don't really feel secure,that i can't see clearly.I have choosen.......There, I shall be.

feverish

2009-07-20T22:03:00.000-07:00

Not feeling so well since last week,my body is hot and feverish.My condition is not serious as when i work i sweat alot,after i sweat i have fever again.Gross!!Damn!! I got sore throat 2 days back,but gargled with luke warm salt water and eat a whole lots of cucumber..PEW~Its gone now.

Last night cant sleep well cos my fever is quite serious,this morning woke up with mild body pain..LOL.H1N1????Nah,i hope not!Gotta 'fix' myself back to top form now.hehehe..

doubt

2009-07-19T07:52:00.000-07:00

质疑
怀疑

总不能好好的判断.

质疑它的存在意义,

质疑它的真实,

质疑它的情感,

质疑它的表达能力,

质疑它的真诚,

质疑它的耐力.

哇!!
它也许早就已经结束了...
是心里在搞鬼吧!

Bon Odori

2009-07-18T09:48:00.001-07:00

I was darn tired today,I guess i sleep too much..haha.Went to Penang Bon Odori today,it was my first time.I never experienced it before,i wanna go before tat but none of my friends want to go.hehe.

I went with Joon and 2 of his friends,we parked our car at Bworth Jetty and took ferry to Explanade.The crowd are scary and i just sweat like hell.We bought foods to eat but not japanese foods,only sushi and teriyaki.hahaha....It was of course expensive.LOL.

I can say i enjoy hanging out with my friends and the fantastic fireworks,other than that..kinda normal,and the people are scary.haha.

My Metamorphosis

2009-07-13T22:03:00.000-07:00

I've been so wrapped up in my warm cocoon

But something's happening, things are changing soon

I'm pushing the edge,

I''m feeling it crack

And once I get out, there's no turning back

Watching the butterfly go towards the sun

I wonder what I will become...........

Metamorphosis

Whatever this is

Whatever I'm going through

I'll be something new

A metamorphosis

Every day is a transformation

Every day is a new sensation

Alteration, modification

An incarnation, celebration

Every day is a new equation

Every day is a revelation

Information,

Anticipation

Onto another destination

这样就足够了

2009-07-10T23:38:00.000-07:00

心神不定好几天了,

不想回去读书,
最怕就是压力和生病.

停在哪儿,

没有想前进,
也,
没有想退后.

隔着一道墙,
我只从缝口偷看,

就这样吧!
这样就足够了.

Rest In Peace

2009-07-09T23:03:00.000-07:00

My uncle passed away few days back,words failed me.Im sad but have to be strong,life moves on.I had this kind of experience past few years,my aunt,my uncle and my grandpa.But we must carry on with our life though it is sad and difficult.....

May You Rest In Peace...........

After 3 years...

2009-07-07T21:14:00.000-07:00

It's been 3 years I have never met my ex bf,last night we went to TAO at Autocity for dinner.I never been there before,but the atmosphere is nice and the foods...huh..how to say?its alot and i hardly ate all,he ate most of it.haha.We seldom talk,maybe still shy or long time didn't meet up already.For me,after break up still can be friends..But he changed already,be a more mature person.I can say it was a great night.hehe.

That's all...

feeling

2009-07-06T21:01:00.000-07:00

It's been a very long time that i didn't feel this happy and relax..Went out for trip with fam,and have fun,catch up midnight show with my buddies.It feels just so different.

I mix up my feelings recently,i feel its not a right thing doing that,but I know that It's under my control.So,just have fun!!hehehe

The Jackson 5----I'll Be There

2009-06-30T00:03:00.000-07:00

You and I must make a pact, we must bring salvation back
Where there is love, I'll be there

I'll reach out my hand to you, I'll have faith in all you do
Just call my name and I'll be there

I'll be there to comfort you,
Build my world of dreams around you, I'm so glad that I found you
I'll be there with a love that's strong
I'll be your strength,
I'll keep holding on

Let me fill your heart with joy and laughter
Togetherness, well that's all I'm after
Whenever you need me, I'll be there
I'll be there to protect you, with an unselfish love that respects you
Just call my name and I'll be there

If you should ever find someone new, I know he'd better be good to you
'Cause if he doesn't, I'll be there
Don't you know, baby, yeah yeah I'll be there,
I'll be there, just call my name, I'll be there

(Just look over your shoulders, honey - oo)

I'll be there, I'll be there, whenever you need me, I'll be there
Don't you know, baby, yeah yeah

I'll be there, I'll be there, just call my name, I'll be there...

Song by Jackson Five.RIP MJ

WANDERFULL...

2009-06-28T23:47:00.000-07:00

Busy,busy weekend....Can say fun and happy weekend too.hehe.After weeks of going out with my high school frens,finally is the turn of my uni frens.haha.Tzu came all the way from Perak to Penang,so Joon decided to have a party.Not really a real party,it was with his fam and only 3 of us.haha.His house is HUGE!!!!with garden,big dogs which name Nicole and Lexus,wonderful family and with rooms that bigger than my living room.zzzz.haha.Had a great trip in his house and warm dinner welcome by his parent.Stayed overnight at his house.

Next morning went to Penang as Tzu seldom go to Penang.Lunch at Red Island Cafe and its GRATIS@FREE!!! Cos our miss Lee chin belanja us.LOL.We never planned anything but at last we wanted to go Penang Hill,it been ages I never visited PH.Still got lotsa time and we went to Kek Lok Si and took photo.Snap,snap..snap here and there.Narzis us.hehe.

PH is as cold as Bandung,and we just relax and took photo over there.A new calender will be put soon by Joon.haha.Im one of the calender girl too.hehe.It was Sunday so it packed with people.Have high tea in one of the hotel,kinda expensive.Wanted to try David Brown"s Restaurant but i guess we cant cos its bloody expensive.haha.

Go down the hill at 5.3opm and got Bin Tai Lou in the cable car...zzzz.The mangsa was me.Damn him!!!I wont let the day spoilt by him of course.Its time to Gurney!!My favourite place in Penang,shopping and eat.Sat beside Gurney Drive and chatting.haha.E n O Hotel and MOIS was the last places we visited.Crazy crazy day but wonderful.Its too bad our other friends cant join us,if not it will be more fun^^.

Visit my up coming uploaded photo which taken from the trip to Bandung in Facebook.

Rain drops keep falling on my headlalala

2009-06-24T02:50:00.000-07:00

The wind was howling outside,

The leaves fall to the ground,

The rain drops keep falling on my roof.

Oh yes!!It rained...and Im on the top of the world again.haha.

Finally,The Rain God answered my prayers.

HE sent rain to this dry sand which hunger for water.

It’s so cold now,i can sleep soundly through the night.Yipeeee~~~~

Days of sleepless night finally,ended.

I hope that the rain will continue for at least a month.haha.

Yeah!The rains give me life..
It wash away my laziness,my worriness and my moddiness(actually still got alot of –ness :P)

Thank God,
I no need to sweat like hell,
I no need to hide in the house from the sun,
I no need to get darker,
I no need to feel lazy in the sunny,hot afternoon.

I can go out and have fun under the rain!!

Hip hip Hooray!!!^^V

confused

2009-06-24T02:47:00.000-07:00

有时候还真的有点搞不清楚,
很茫然.

跟中学朋友聊天,
聊到了现在择偶应有的条件,
他说到了这个年龄,
我们应该选择那些跟我们有相同收入的,
并不代收入要一样,
可是不可以有太多的差异.
所谓的mutual benefit.

对我来说,
我是个靠感觉的人,
若是没感觉叫我怎么和那个人在一起呢?
年龄越大考量的东西越多,

难道真的要考虑到这点?
呼~~真的很困扰.

钱,
对我来说不是一切.
身边的朋友随着年龄增长都想要未来的伴侣是有钱的.

真搞不清.. 还是不清.

Hiking+Yam char

2009-06-20T09:39:00.000-07:00

Today woke up early in the morning went to hiking with my family,not include my bro,he cant wake up.LOL.went to Tokun and took in the fresh air,but then still sleepy.My stamina already got better so i can finished the hiking.haha.talked alot and took alot of photos too.haha.Breakfast at the coffee shop down hill,i took yam rice.reali yum~~Yum~~wakakakka..

Night time went out with the same group of frens,but this time include shu yi,yun ting,jefrey,Yee An and lots of them..Tonight reali a good timing for all of us to meet.haha..short summary for today,but its very very nice.I just can said that,hard to describe.LOL.Good nite^^

Crushing myself

2009-06-17T22:19:00.000-07:00

I once thought that there are no boundaries between You and Me,
but i guess that i was wrong.

The huge wall placed between us,
its not so easy to break the wall.

For me it's just another crush,
for you??what izit?

徘徊

2009-06-16T08:47:00.000-07:00

徘徊在
可不可以,

能不能,

会不会,

敢不敢,

的三叉路口.

想要前进,

但,
又没有勇气.

有时很羡慕他们的勇气.

对!!
我没勇气.

害怕同样的事情再次让我耿耿于怀.

最近,
把时间放在别的事情上,
不再去思考同样的问题.

等待的心情也不再强烈.

我心深处,
还依然那么的小心翼翼.

只想,
你自己会明白.

I like to play

2009-06-16T08:16:00.000-07:00

Why i want to update my blog today?Cos i had fun again with my high school frens..hehe.This time four of us including me..hehe.We went to Gurney at Penang cos we want to sing karaoke!!LOL.We sang for 3 hours..haha.And guess what?We got the largest roomcos they already out of small of small rooms,4 of us in a room that can fit in 25 people.haha.We sang until our sounds broke already.haha.But today the star was Kin Wah,he sang alot of songs.haha.salut!!

We decided to go for movie after that Terminator Salvation,i watched it before at Bandung,but still wanna watch it again.hehe.Half way through the movie,i went out and meet with YY.With Jim too,kinda shy and feel uneasy.I don't know what to say to Jim rather than Hi and Helo.Thats very very bad.Hmmmmmm........

Nice day...fantastic but tired too..ahha.Long time din on my MSN.KInda miss it..haha.I stop being confuse,but I still cant get over it.

Im happy

2009-06-14T08:46:00.000-07:00

Its been so long that i meet this group of friends,one year?Maybe..I don't feel it when i was in high school last time,i just mix with my own group of friends.But now i felt that they are really a good friends.hehe.

5 of us went to Bandar Perda,Jusco today.We planned to watch Terminator,but i watched it before at Bandung already.Finally we made up our mind to watch Blood:The Last Vampire.Do you want to know how GOOD the movie is?It was horrible and bored.I felt asleep in the cinema at some point.haha.Its not recomended at all.zzzz.

Had our lovely dinner at hocker stall in Lunas,the foods was fantastic.It just a hocker stall but then the foods were delicious and cheap.haha.We took french fries,Hai nan chicken and Yi Fu Mi.hehe..It really make my day after the horrible movie.LOL.

I love this gang of friends,now i realise friends are not just about the same group of person that you mix with everyday.The other friends around us can be nice and fun too^^

Penang~~

2009-06-10T06:08:00.001-07:00

Busy busy day lately,but i just busy going out with my family.Day before yesterday went to Penang.Penang,got foods that u cant resist.haha.Woke up very early in the morning,kinda sleepy.haha.But its excited.We went to took our Brunch(breakfast+lunch),that shop is kinda old,but the food...what can i say?its very delicious,its call beef keow teow.Wah,so damn delicious.I took the whole bowl with rice.

Headed to Gurney plazy after that,the weather as usual hot and burning,ran and hide inside the plaza.haha.We went for movie,17 Again.Nice and educative.haha.Have some shopping,bought sumthing from PDI,Watson,Elle and Body Glove..hehe.Have high tea at Secret Recipe,Yum~~Yum~~

Dinner at the hocker stalls beside Gurney,it just Monday but the crowd was so scary.haha.We hardly find a nice place to seat.hehe.Relax beside the beach after dinner,Ahhh...long time din realy enjoy this with my family..Gotta treasure this kind or moment.hehe.

夜晚

2009-06-06T10:16:00.000-07:00

今天的夜晚好平静。
每当在夜深人静的时候，人们总是会不由自主的陷入一个很奇怪的心情。
这种心情，能让你表现出你最脆弱的一面，并且让你思考一些你在白天时不会去想的问起。
可能是夜晚的黑吧，就让你觉得自己好渺小，好无助。
想着想着，情绪也开始沉默了下来。
刚刚满脸笑容的我，不知去了哪了。平时那信心满满的我，也不知去了哪了。
*
我对这“心情”不陌生。
其实，我还蛮喜欢这种感觉的。
它让我有能力去抒发一些在别人面前不会表现出来的情绪，面对一些我一直藏在心里而不敢去面对的事情。
感觉上，在夜深人静时一个人的我，才是最真实的我。
没有伪装，没有所谓的似非，就能让我很坦然的去面对自己。
在这时，镜子里浮现的倒影才是真正的自己。
*
望出窗外，天色还是漆黑一片。
夜晚虽美，但还是短暂的。
就像烟火，灿烂辉煌后，还是化为乌有。
夜晚，终究还是会败给黎明。
*
我很喜欢夜晚的感觉。
真期待，明天的夜晚。

good morning

2009-06-05T21:00:00.000-07:00

Woke early one morning,
the earth lay cool and still,

when suddenly a tiny bird,
perched on my window sill,
it sang a song so lovely,
so carefree and so gay,

that slowly all my troubles,
began to slip away,

it sang of far off places,
of laughter and of fun,
it seemed his very song,
brought out the morning sun,

I pulled back the covers,
and crept slowly out of bed,
and gently shut the window,
and crushed his freaking head,
I'm not a morning person .

Continue to sleep~~~XD

Eat+fat=XD

2009-06-05T03:03:00.000-07:00

Eat,eat and eat....my friends said that i bcum more plum..zzzz...fat already.hahaha.even my mum said that i cant get any more fat,if not i will...hahaha....Days in Malaysia still very hot,chatted with Lee Chin,we both agreed that its kinda bored at Malaysia,nothing for us to do.hahaha...

Wanna meet my classmate last night,but most of them not free.Sigh....gotta go out with Ching,Dar and Jojo later.Going to have dinner..hehehe....

Will update my blog in this holiday,but i guess its not as fun and interesting when i was in Bandung..hehe.

Malaysia...~~

2009-06-04T08:10:00.000-07:00

Wah,i came back to Malaysia already.Once the airplane touched the ground,i was so excited.hehe.But then its very very hot,extremely hot over here,even when the time is late at night,but there are no wind.zzzz.

I just wanna stay at home.too hot already.cannot tahan at all.hehe.But then the happiest thing is i can meet my family,and thats the thing that im happy.The first food that i ate is pork porridge..hehehe..pork!!!LOL...sorry.

NO internet connection at the first few days,i guess i just sleep the whole day.LOL.now got internet coonection already.hehe.so happy.LOL.

What i wanna do?What i miss?

2009-05-30T07:04:00.000-07:00

This will be the last night at Bandung,well,it doesn’t mean that i will not come back again.I will come back again after 2 months,at 10th of August i think.

Maybe you will ask me what i going to do when go back to Malaysia,i will eat,will sleep like a hibernating polar bear,will chat with my beloved family and friends,will go out and shopping,will go to have trip with my family,will cook for my sis and bro,will learn how to make cookies,will go to KL and Penang to meet with my friends.Those are the things that i didn’t do for a long time.Last semester break when i go back i was very busy to have all this plans.hehe.Can’t wait to go back,Caryn already went back.Enjoy ya!!hehe.

However,i will have feelings to something at Bandung too.I already studied here for one year,i can’t imagine i finished my first year.Ya,already one year,and i have lots of feelings toward this city on the hill(i named it myself XD).I will miss the cold weather here,will miss some of my favourite foods here,will miss the mall such as PVJ and Ciwalk,will miss ITB,will miss my kosan at Dago,will miss my kosan ibu and Chris,will miss my room,will miss my freedom over here,will miss my friends that study together with me,will miss my newly-known friend,will miss my big mirror,will miss my big pink pig which my friends gave me during my birthday,will miss.....alot huh?!I guess my feelings are strong. Kinda sad when i know i going to leave all those stuff behind...Can i bring them to Malaysia too??hehe.

But..i will be come back here soon..hehe.Just have fun,have a nice holiday then i will come back.^^

See all of you soon~~Sayonara.hehe.

내 머리가 나빠서

2009-05-29T05:59:00.000-07:00

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